Comedian Kevin Pollak stopped by Thursday morning and gave The Tommy Show some insight on his latest book, How I Slept My Way to the Middle.

Pollak said the book is about “telling a lot of stories about working with ridiculous freaks in show business all these years.”

He briefly named some of the actors that are mentioned in his book, but the biggest chapter is one involving him, Tom Cruise and a pen.

While working on a film together, he said Cruise would make notes on the script, using this huge pen — it was like a Montblanc on steroids.

Pollak said after working with him for some time he began to feel comfortable around him, the stand-up comedian in him came out and he teased Cruise about the size of the pen.

So, Cruise offered to let him try it.

“It was like an angel wing floating on a cloud,” Pollack said. “The pen tried to have sex with me at some point.”

He said at one point during shooting, one of Cruise’s assistants brought him a gift and it was one of these super-expensive pens.

A few days later, Pollack said he was making his own notes on the script, using a regular stick pen. When Cruise asked him why he wasn’t using the pen he had given him, Pollack said he couldn’t use the pen because it had now become a story.

“It goes on my mantel with a pin light hitting it just right. When people come over to my house, I tell them the story … it’s the greatest pen story they’re ever gonna hear.”

Apparently, Cruise really wanted him to use the pen, because he bought him another that he could place on the mantel.

Pollak is in town doing a show at the D.C. Improv from March 28-30. Click here for show info.


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